Best friends

I know it's been a while, but I still can't even begin to tell you just how much I miss you guys. I opened some letters you guys gave me. I started to tear. as i was reading, my mom came in the room and asked what was wrong but i just said "nothing" I think I did a pretty good job of hiding my misery...-NOT. anyways. i remember during summer of 2008 I would stay up at night, staring at the ceiling, and the next thing I knew I would just start crying. So much for being a tough girl.

There was a time when I called the States my home. Now I just walk around, blank and uncertain. Even at family reunions, I just don't FIT in. Everything just feels so empty sometimes. Anyway, my new school is big and cold. It's hard when I'm walking from class to class, and I can't help but remember just 11 months ago, everything seemed so perfect.

Everyone tells us how lucky we are, having the opportunity to live in other countries, experience cultures, and travel. I know this is true, and believe me, I'm incredibly grateful. Still, everyone forgets to mention, the moving, the goodbyes, those painful lost "relationships"--and the list goes on. As I think about it more and more, I truly believe we really do have good lives. What we have seen and experienced will, in the end, build us up instead of tear us down. I just wish we could skip all of the hard stuff. We go through more than most people realize, but I think it will be worth it. Just for the time I got to spend with you guys, I would endure a lifetime of being the new kid. For a long time, it seemed that there was no method to the madness of this world. Now I am holding to the belief that there really is a master plan. I do think God has got our lives worked out. It is so easy for me to get apathetic and quit trying. what I am trying to say is I NEED you guys. Maybe if we all keep trying, no matter how far apart we are, we will all get through. i miss you guys.